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This year, I was lucky enough to spend my 30th birthday in New York with my girlfriend, Claire. As a treat to both of us, I decided to upgrade our Virgin tickets to Premium Economy, and it was here that I reflected upon flying on business and more specifically: How do the pros do it?

When I say pros, I mean those who fly long haul with work on a weekly basis. These people need to get through a long flight and walk straight into a meeting, looking sharp and being switched on.

Claire is a frequent flyer and I’m sure she’d agree that, unless you have a fully flat bed-seat, you’ll be uncomfortable no matter which airline, class or destination you choose. And sleep? Well, that’s pretty unlikely. On the red eye, you have the inital disturbance of people settling in. Then you have some sort of dinner service, drinks and then the clear up. It’s a good 2 or more hours before the lights will be dimmed and things calm down. And then what? An hour or more before landing, you’ll be woken again with the abrupt switch-on of the lights and a dry shrink-wrapped muffin and some gut-rotting coffee to sink before you’re released back into society. An 8 hour flight might yield 2 or 3 hours of sleep if you’re lucky.

So how do you beat the system? Enter our hero.

On the flight back from New York, we witnessed a guy who so clearly does it every week that he has the system nailed. He did not rely on rapidly downing as many units alcohol as possible before the lights go out. Oh no, he was asleep long before the lights went out. I’m going to do my best here to document our hero’s step-by-step guide to flying like a winner:

1. Plan ahead

If you have any ability to choose your seat, you should absolutely take this up whether it’s in advance of the trip, or on the day of travel at the check-in desk. Key criteria:

• Be as far forward in the plane as possible. Business or first class tickets help by default here. There’s something about being closer to the font that seems to lessen the roller-coaster feeling upon ascent and descent.
• Be as far forward in your chosen cabin as possible, subject the other rules below. The main benefit of this is that you’ll be served more quickly, and therefore be able to get to sleep sooner.
• Try and get a window seat if you can. Alternatively, you want a seat that doesn’t block someone else in. A weak bladder next to you could spell interruption after interruption.
• Ideally avoid a row near to the lavatories or the galleys. People will congregate and disturb you.

2. Board the plane as early as possible

The professional flyers’ regime will take a little effort up-front and it’s a good idea to get started without others around to get in your way. If you are travelling buiness or first, you should get the option to board the plane first. Take this up. Don’t worry, you’ll be asleep before long.

3. Get comfortable

This is going to come down to personal preference, but our hero immediately removed his shoes and put flight socks on over his own socks. You’re also going to want to get the blanket out and a pillow if you want one.

3. Prepare for a quick exit

The rule here is to go for simplicity. Don’t get anything out that you don’t absolutely need during the flight. Our hero had with him solely an iPod. He then placed his shoes neatly into a small plastic bag each and stored them beneath his seat.

4. Get into Do Not Disturb mode

Steps 4 and 5 are the most important in the whole process. Do these well and you’ll get the r&r that you need and deserve. Do Not Disturb mode requires that you block out the rest of the world and avoid the necessity for all distruptions with the exception of those absolutley necessary in steps 5 and 6 below. Here’s how you get into Do Not Disturb mode:

• Review the menu, choose your bland meal and write the follwing on the back of the menu in block capitals: “PLEASE WAKE ME FOR THE MEAL. I’LL HAVE THE CHICKEN”
• Find a gap or nook somewhere on the seatback in front of you and stuff the menu in so that your instructions are clearly visible to the flight crew
• Put your iPod headphones is and crank up your personal choice of music to sleep to. I’m going to go with MJ Cole – Back to Mine
• Fasten your seatbelt
• Adorn your blanket. Crucially, we put this on over the seatbelt
• Put your supplied eye-mask on
• Drift off until you are rudely awoken

5. Make others aware of the consequences of disturbing you

You’ll notice that in step 4, we committed the cardinal sin of obscuring the view of the seatbelt. This is a necessary step. As early as possible in the flight, you will need to be awoken in order to give the staff your most infuriated, disgusted, disappointed face. This tells the crew, as well as whoever is lucky enough to be sat beside you, that waking you up, disturbing you or otherwise doing anything too loudly is most definitely not to be recommended. Not without your permission anyway. This is your opportunity to show them who’s boss. You’re the seasoned veteran of air travel and you’ll be damned if some hunchbacked, toothless simpleton is going to stand between you and the hours of sleep that you’re so looking forward to. After you have complied with the firm but polite request to fasten your seatbelt on top of your blanket, you will be free to get some well deserved kip before meal time.

6. Get the meal out of the way

The meal will be the last time that you’re disturbed before morning. If you managed to sit towards the front, you’ll be served earlier and they’ll clear it up earlier too. Your helpful instructions should mean that you’ll be gently caressed back into consciousness with your meal sat in front of you. Splendid.

Once you’ve finished eating and neatly piled the empty single-serving containers on the tray, you’re finally ready for some quality shut-eye.

7. Final flourish. The fine art of the moving blanket

You  have a little latitude here. For the novice, I’d recommend getting suited back up as per step 4 (adjusting for seatbelt placement, of course) and settling into your slumber. The more advanced traveller may, however, wish end the flight with a final demonstration of superiority. Enter the moving blanket:

This is a feat that will take some practice to master but once perfected, others will look on in awe whilst you sleep peacefully until your blanket awakens you shorlty before landing. Using this technique, you will no longer need your eye-mask. Instead, you pull the blanket up over your head and go to sleep. Throughout the remainder of the flight, little by little the blanket will creep down. First across your head, later down your forhead and finally below your eyes. At this point, the cabin lights will wake you up and you’ll be ready to ditch the flying gear, put your shoes on and get the hell outta there.

To our hero from Virgin flight VS10 out of JFK, we salute you, sir.